Larry and Linda (not their real names) married after 3 years of dating...
Larry and Linda were exclusive then but not all together faithful with God’s plan for a relationship before marriage. Both came from broken homes where their parents were divorced and they were determined as Believers in Christ to not repeat the same mistakes. Because they knew God’s plan for Marriage was for life – a very good thing - they wanted to be sure they were right for each other.
After another 3 years this time as husband and wife, they started becoming despondent about their relationship and sought marriage advice in their Church – another very good thing. Enter their Marriage Mentors. Wonderful people who had been through some hard knocks of their own and now had kids past college age.
Larry and Linda sought their assistance, help and advice. After doing a couple of the first key exercises, their Mentors recommended they do Genograms and Emotional Algebra (important note here – neither were good at Algebra nor emotions ... but their Mentors said, “Oh well, just do it!”) 🙂
Thanks to the Mentors interactions, and their good sage advice, the couple discovered their families of origin made a harder impact on them than they thought. Larry’s father had actually been married and divorced 3 times during his upbringing and Linda’s parents divorced when she was a teenager. It doesn't matter when parent’s divorce. Even if the “kids” are middle age it has an impact.
Larry and Linda are determined to do something about it. Through these efforts they proceeded to put into place skills to offset their experiences. Now with the loving support of their Church, Mentors and lots of prayerful determination, they are happily-ever-aftering.
No one gets through this life unscathed. But we can learn more about ourselves and with the wonderful help of others who are determined to be just as Christ-like, we can make it ... and make it very, very well.